11 Telemarketer prank ideas

Telemarketers bothering you again? Get even with these telemarketer prank ideas.

1. Fake Robbery/Shooting Prank
It pays to keep a paper bag or two next to your phone for an impromptu telemarketer prank. When the telemarketer calls, stop him halfway through his sales pitch and ask him to hang on for a second, then say, "I think someone is at the door". Inflate your paper bags in hand then pretend to answer the door. Once you've made the door open sound, yell, "Who are you??? Put the gun down!! Put it down!!" in the background. Pop your two paper bags one after the other near the phone.

The telemarketer is probably freaking out at this point. You can either hang up, or pick up the phone to continue the conversation in a disguised voice and deny anything happened.

2. Hard of hearing
What better way to annoy anyone, including a telemarketer, by getting them to incessantly repeat themselves? Even more so if they can't reasonably yell at their source of frustration. In this prank, pretend to be an old man (or lady) and speak with a heavy accent. Keep asking the telemarketers to repeat themselves and tell them several times that you're hard of hearing.

If you wish to prolong the prank, tell them how you find their product interesting when you sense they are about to put down the phone. That should keep them on the line longer. If they do say anything rude out of frustration, quickly yell "I heard that!" and slam the phone down.

3. You know how I feel
The next time a telemarketer calls you, let him get into the middle of a sales pitch, then stop him mid-sentence. Tell him that you're interested in what he needs to say but you're really busy, then ask for his home number so that you can call him back. He'll very likely refuse to do so citing privacy concerns, or he may just try to sidestep the issue by offering to call you back.

Either way, just say, "I get it. You don't want people bothering you at home, right? That's how I feel too". Then hang up.

4. You're that prankster!
When a telemarketer calls you, get him to introduce himself. Then exclaim, "You're that punk (his name) who's been prank calling me all week! Look, I'm calling the cops on you, then hang up". If he calls again, pretend that it's the first time he called and deny that anything happened. Then play one of the other pranks listed here on him.

5. Exclusive bias
In this telemarketer prank, pretend to be exclusive. Ask if he belongs to a particular nationality, e.g. if he's a Canadian. If he says no, say "We only talk to Canadians". If he says yes, say "We don't talk to your kind". Then hang up.

6. Doppelganger
After the telemarketer introduces himself, quickly chime in and say "Hey, that's my name too!", then follow up quickly and ask where he's from. Immediately after he tells you, say "I grew up there!", then quickly follow up with other personal questions. Each time he answers, enthusiastically say that you are exactly the same. Keep going for as long as you can. When he starts asking for the man or lady of the house, play one of the other telemarketer pranks on him, or just tell him that he or she is not home.

7. Legal?
Once the telemarketer introduces the product, questions the legality of each and every statement they make, no matter how ridiculous is sounds (that is the point, after all!). E.g., "Are you sure that insurance is legal in my state? What about claiming for insurance, is that legal? What about the premium payments, is it legal to pay by card or cash?" etc. He'll catch on to what you're trying to do, eventually.

8. I'll buy yours if you buy mine
When the telemarketer asks you if you wish to purchase or subscribe the product, offer to sign up IF they buy your "product". It could be a real product that you sell, or a fictitious one. Tell them it's a win-win, and see their response. If, against the odds, they are interested in the deal, you can "gracefully" exit the conversation by following up with another telemarketer prank from this list.

9. Yes...yes...yes...yes
Just say yes after each question! Most telemarketer will usually ask you a question to get a response from you, so just say yes. You yes answers will most likely get you past a few questions without them suspecting that something is up. An alternative to just saying yes is to just say no to every single question.

10. Why?
For every non-question sentence that the telemarketer makes, ask "Why?". Add this with prank #9 and you can have more fun out of this telemarketer prank.

11. How am I? My day sucks!
Some telemarketers, if not all, will ask you how you're doing. Tell them a sob story, that you got fired, you got a speeding ticket and found your wife cheating on you when you got home, plus you're broke and there's nothing to eat tonight. Your imagination is the limit. Then ask him how HE is.

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